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"The best political, social, and spiritual work we can do is to withdraw the projection of our shadow onto others." -Carl Jung
#58 February/March 2010 PDF Print E-mail

Greetings From Isis

Our New Year’s Theme Get’s Actualized:

Create anew from inspiration, not from memory.

 On January 1, 2010 I started the full moon and the new year with an in-depth healing bodywork session. Two excellent body therapists, their teacher, who is a master body worker, and I come together for the purpose of healing, learning and exploring.

 The session took me back to an incident many years ago, when I fell off a moving horse. I was feeling my power in full gallop when the cinch broke and I went flying. I landed on my right hip and was unable to move. A woman dragged me out of the arena so that I wouldn’t be trampled by the other horses. My body/mind’s interpretation of that event went something like this: protect, defend, stay still, don’t move, contract, and most loudly, “What were you thinking getting on your high horse like that anyhow?” (A favorite line of my mother’s). I did not register the rescue--only the trauma of the fall and the shame of feeling so free and powerful.  For many years prior to the fall, I had entwined and internalized other people’s messages and concluded that it was dangerous and shameful to be seen, be free and to be powerful. This accident served to solidify those thoughts within me.

 Now 13 years later, this healing session freed up the frozen energy that I had been carrying around ever since. These practitioners spoke directly to my whole self, to my body/mind/emotions/spirit with their words, hearts and hands and communicated the suggestion for forward motion back into me. I left feeling ready to get back on my metaphoric horse and ride! It was my turn now to take all this newly freed-up energy and make a life-affirming statement with it.

 Holistic bodywork is co-creative, we are engaged to participate in our own healing process, not turn ourselves over to someone to do it for or to us. Holisitc practitioners can lead us to our blocked energy and support us in being with it. They can hold space and share wisdom so we can re-discover and transform ourselves. The final step of actually claiming the healing though, is always ours to take. I have observed over the years that whenever energy is freed up in us, we get to decide with our actions, exactly how we want to reinvest that energy. We will create for ourselves, shortly afterward a healing--opportunities that give us a chance to make these decisions. I liken it to voting with our energy. Do we cast our energy vote for contraction or expansion?

 My voting time came about two weeks later, just before the closing of first moon cycle. Linda said something and I interpreted it in a way that caused me to feel ashamed for being me. I felt exactly like I did as a child. I heard her tone to even be like my mother’s had been. As I sat with the experience for a while, I realized that Linda’s words had put me in direct contact with the energy that had just been freed up in my healing session. This situation was giving me the perfect opportunity to decide exactly how I wanted to reinvest it.  

 The way I saw it, I could either protect, defend, and contract or reveal, unfold and expand. The part of me that wanted to make this about her was the contracting part, the part of me that knew this was only about me was the expanding part. Every time my mind went over the conversation looking for a way to make it about her, my own sweet heart would take me by the hand and show me that this was my movie and my friend was a player on my stage: this was about me, not her. This was my gift to myself.  To blame her was to engage in duality consciousness. If I wanted to invest my freed up energy in Oneness consciousness then I would have to see her as a loving co-creative aspect of me. I just stayed with my desire for freedom and kept breathing, sinking and expanding down deep inside myself. The more I stayed with myself, the easier it became to see her as this loving co-creator. 

 By the time I saw her the following day I was fully in the Oneness flow. I was easily able to let this new flow have an expression through me. I happily and excitedly told her that I had been triggered but that I knew it was her co-creating a healing opportunity for me. Expansive feelings and the words just flowed out of me: Thank you! I love you, I love all of you, especially the parts that would gift me this opportunity. We hugged and as I walked away I unexpectedly burst into tears. I had a sudden and clear new perspective on my childhood. I turned back and shared with her that I wish I would’ve been able to say what I had just said to her, to my mother who had died 21 years ago. I saw how my mother had just been loving me the best she knew how. Instant and absolute forgiveness flooded up from my sacrum. There was no need to defend against love, and for me now, in this area, love was all there was, love freely expressed, given and received. One vote for expansion freed up a lifetime of blocked energy. 

 Linda shares that she also experienced a profound healing though this experience. Our sharing freed up contracted energy in her. She made new choices and took new actions in her life and reinvested that newly flowing energy back into her own heart. The nourishment has made it effortlessly possible for her to more clearly express herself and subsequently, allow more love into her life.

 Since our partnership is a close and deliberate co-creative process that weaves in and out of every aspect of our Isis endeavors, we are excited to see how this expansive new awareness will express itself in our work.

 My willingness to stay with my self is what sunk me into my contracted energy. Taking the parts of me that understand Oneness into the depths of the parts of me that only understood duality is like bringing warm sunlight in to melt ice. As that ice melted, its form changed into flowing water, (from contraction to expansion), it is all my own energy only it’s expression has changed. 

 My body has never felt so good, my mind is clear, my heart is open and I am more understanding of the balance that the One Heart brings to us all.

 Let’s Invest in Expansion! ~ Blessings, Maya

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